I was having a bit of writers block, lacking the inspiration or the topic to write about. I saw something online that was called "100 facts about me" and I thought to myself, well that should be easy. So I started a list and let me tell you, it was a bit hard. As I got to the higher numbers I would find it harder to put a down a fact and then I would go back and change some out for better ones. It's an interesting thing to sit back and list only 100 facts that you would like people to know. Some people may be surprised my list, others will not be. But I would like to share it with you, while I work on my writers block issue:
1)My name is Edwin 2) I am a Taurus 3) Born in May 4) I married my wife in 2009 5) Youngest of 3 children 6) I have 3 parents (Mom, Dad and Step Dad) 7) One older sister 8) One Older Brother 9) One older step-sister 10) One Niece 11) 4 Nephews 12) I am my Nieces God Father 13) One Sister-in-law 14) 2 brothers-in-law 15)I met my wife in June of 2001 16)Proposed on 8/8/08 17)I was born in San Francisco 18) I was married in San Francisco 19) My favorite sport is Baseball 20) My favorite team is the World Champion San Francisco Giants 21) second favorite team The San Francisco 49ers 22)I am a big wrestling (WWE) fan 23) Favorite all time wrestler: Bret "Hitman" Hart 24) Current favorite wrestler: Chris Jericho 25) My favorite number is 25 26)Favorite color: Orange 27) Favorite number on a Baseball jersey: 21 28) Previously worked for Starbucks 29) Currently working for a non-profit 30) Went to Monroe, Riverside and Paul Revere elementary schools 31) Went to James Denmon middle school 32)Graduated from Jefferson High school c/o '99 33) Got an AA from CCSF 34) Got a BA from SFSU 35) my favorite movie is: Field of Dreams 36) my favorite cartoon movie is: Beauty and the Beast 37)My favorite artist is: Michal Jackson 38)My favorite album is: Thriller 39) Favorite Michael Jackson song: Off the Wall 40) Favorite song: Never can say goodbye by the Jackson 5 41) Favorite female artist: Shakira 42) enjoy country music 43) Have a Facebook account 44) can be followed on Twitter @EddieTheGiant25 45)Started this blog this year 46) My best friend is:Amilcar 47)I am superstitious during Baseball season 48) I wear my Black Giants jacket when they are at home 49) I wear my gray Giants jacket when they are on the road 50) I wear my Orange Giants jacket on Orange Fridays 51) The fact that I do that does not make me crazy! 52) I like to cook 53) I like to write 54) I enjoy simple things 55) I like being on time 56) I hate it when I am late 57)attended the last home game at Candlestick park 58) have seen games at Pacific Bell, SBC, AT&T park 59) Have seen the Giants play at the Oakland Coliseum 60) Have seen the Giants play in Olympic Stadium in Montreal 61) have visited Nicaragua 62) Visited New Orleans 62) Visited Disneyland 63) Visited Disney World 64) Visited New York City 65) Have been to the Baseball Hall Of Fame in Cooperstown 66) Have been to Las Vegas 67) I have seen Prince in concert 68) I have seen Janet Jackson in concert 69) I have seen Shakira in concert 70) I have seen Barry Manilow in concert 71) I used to play 2B, SS and 3B when I played Baseball 72) My favorite opera is 'Phantom of the Opera' 73) I have been to Hollywood 74)I would love to travel the world with my wife 75) I don't like coffee 76) I only keep in contact with 2 people I worked with from Starbucks 77)I have a fear of heights 78) Terrible at First Person Shooter games 79)I believe in God 80) I don't care if people don't like me 81) I am happy with myself 82) I am a Batman fan 83)My favorite player is Barry Bonds 84) I was a big Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fan was I was younger 85)I like to sing 86) Love songs get my spirits up when I am down 87) I never trust a big butt and a smile 88) I love to listen to sports talk radio 89) I remember the '89 quake 90) I pray at least 3 times a day 91) I am looking forward to growing old with my wife 92)I am not afraid of getting older 93) I have never been to a strip club 94) I am a lover, not a fighter 95) I have a sensitive soul 96) when I get really mad my eyes begin to tear up 97) I have over 5,000 songs on my iPod 98) I look forward to having my own family with my wife and kids 99) I had a beard in San Francisco before it was the cool thing to do (i.e. Fear the Beard) 100) I have trouble sleeping.
Well there you have it. 100 facts about me. There are many more, but I will keep those with me and share that with my Family and Friends. Well, until next time....
Friday, March 25, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
It's not just a game...
It is no secret that in the sports world, my one and only true love is Baseball. It always has been and it always will be. Baseball to me is the ultimate team game, that can also put one person in the spotlight. I know that some people out there say Baseball is "boring" "too long' "not as exciting as Football" But i disagree. To me, Baseball is a thinking mans game. A chess game if you will, with 25 players, 9 players on the field on defense ready to attack. The people who oppose Baseball may not fully understand it. To know Baseball you have got to embrace it, learn it, play it, live it, love it. Baseball is a commitment, it is paying attention to details and being aware of the game.
Baseball is a game of numbers, 162 games, 9 player, 9 innings, 27 outs, 90 feet between the bases, 60'-6" from the pitchers mound to home plate and 108 double stitches on a Baseball (That's 216 in total for you math wizards). There are numbers that are magical 24, 42, 56, 73, 762, .400 along with 2,632 and 4,256. If you do not recognize these numbers, you should look them up. For as long as I can remember I have been a San Francisco Giants fan, the Orange and Black that grace the uniform are the perfect combination. But I'll get more into that later.
To me Baseball is a simple game with sometimes complicated rules, sure not everyone knows what a "balk" is, or what exactly the "infield fly rule" is, but on the surface everyone knows what the basics are of Baseball. 6 outs in an inning (3 for each side), 9 innings in a regulation game, 27 outs for each side and as the song goes "it's 1, 2, 3 strikes, yer out! at the old ballgame" Baseball is a fair game, better then some life situations. For instance, think about the last time you sacrificed your turn for anything for anyone, chances are the outcome for you was negative. In Baseball, if you are successful with you sacrifice, it does not count against your batting average. But you are given credit for a job well done. Also think about a time when you failed 7 out of 10 times? what did people think of you then? what did you think of yourself? But in Baseball take those 3 times out of 10 that you were a success, that makes you a .300 hitter and a very good ball player.
What I also love about Baseball is the experience. When playing with family or friends, I love the smell of the glove as it comes out of hiding in your bag. The way it conforms itself to your hand like an old friend waiting to protect you. The smell of the grass, the sound the dirt makes when you step on it, the crack of the bat. The instincts that you come across while playing Baseball are amazing, that first step, taking the perfect angle, taking the long strides and stretching your body out to the fullest to catch that ball and all while dreaming of playing for a Major League team.
I said it before, my team is the San Francisco Giants, sorry, let me rephrase that, The World Series Champion San Francisco Giants. When I go down to AT&T Park, I like to get there early, I love to see the bright green grass, the infield dirt being watered down. The team stretching before the game. I love to hear the line ups, being able to cheer for the hometown nine and jeering the visitors. My experience at the ballpark is not complete without hearing the National Anthem.
I love this game, I love watching the players after the pitch is thrown, before the batter decides if he will swing, just to see how the defense reacts to the pitch selection. It fun to follow along and try to guess what will happen next: hit and run, bunt, steal, etc. Sure Baseball can break your heart, make you cry, make you wonder why you invest so much into it, need an example? 2002. (I still can't fully talk about it). But when Baseball leaves in the fall, you know that just like an old reliable friend every spring it will be back and you will have a hell of a summer with the boys on the diamond. Baseball creates heroes, goats and hall of famers. For me Baseball has created some of the best memories I have had. Above all, to really understand Baseball there are a few things you must do:
1) Learn how to keep score of a Baseball game
2) Learn how to appreciate the Ballpark Experience
3) Learn how to listen to the radio broadcasts
4) Support your team no matter what
5) Play the game, embrace the game, be the game
6) Never give up hope, there is no time limit on the game, stay until the final out
You do not have to be the best player out there, if you have the passion, desire and love of this game. It will love you back and you will have fun playing in the sandlots or parks where you go. I honestly do not know where I would be without Baseball. In life there are decisions that we make, when I was young I turned to Baseball instead of turning to bad influences. During good times and bad times Baseball has helped me through them. I will forever be grateful and I will forever love Baseball...
Baseball is a game of numbers, 162 games, 9 player, 9 innings, 27 outs, 90 feet between the bases, 60'-6" from the pitchers mound to home plate and 108 double stitches on a Baseball (That's 216 in total for you math wizards). There are numbers that are magical 24, 42, 56, 73, 762, .400 along with 2,632 and 4,256. If you do not recognize these numbers, you should look them up. For as long as I can remember I have been a San Francisco Giants fan, the Orange and Black that grace the uniform are the perfect combination. But I'll get more into that later.
To me Baseball is a simple game with sometimes complicated rules, sure not everyone knows what a "balk" is, or what exactly the "infield fly rule" is, but on the surface everyone knows what the basics are of Baseball. 6 outs in an inning (3 for each side), 9 innings in a regulation game, 27 outs for each side and as the song goes "it's 1, 2, 3 strikes, yer out! at the old ballgame" Baseball is a fair game, better then some life situations. For instance, think about the last time you sacrificed your turn for anything for anyone, chances are the outcome for you was negative. In Baseball, if you are successful with you sacrifice, it does not count against your batting average. But you are given credit for a job well done. Also think about a time when you failed 7 out of 10 times? what did people think of you then? what did you think of yourself? But in Baseball take those 3 times out of 10 that you were a success, that makes you a .300 hitter and a very good ball player.
What I also love about Baseball is the experience. When playing with family or friends, I love the smell of the glove as it comes out of hiding in your bag. The way it conforms itself to your hand like an old friend waiting to protect you. The smell of the grass, the sound the dirt makes when you step on it, the crack of the bat. The instincts that you come across while playing Baseball are amazing, that first step, taking the perfect angle, taking the long strides and stretching your body out to the fullest to catch that ball and all while dreaming of playing for a Major League team.
I said it before, my team is the San Francisco Giants, sorry, let me rephrase that, The World Series Champion San Francisco Giants. When I go down to AT&T Park, I like to get there early, I love to see the bright green grass, the infield dirt being watered down. The team stretching before the game. I love to hear the line ups, being able to cheer for the hometown nine and jeering the visitors. My experience at the ballpark is not complete without hearing the National Anthem.
I love this game, I love watching the players after the pitch is thrown, before the batter decides if he will swing, just to see how the defense reacts to the pitch selection. It fun to follow along and try to guess what will happen next: hit and run, bunt, steal, etc. Sure Baseball can break your heart, make you cry, make you wonder why you invest so much into it, need an example? 2002. (I still can't fully talk about it). But when Baseball leaves in the fall, you know that just like an old reliable friend every spring it will be back and you will have a hell of a summer with the boys on the diamond. Baseball creates heroes, goats and hall of famers. For me Baseball has created some of the best memories I have had. Above all, to really understand Baseball there are a few things you must do:
1) Learn how to keep score of a Baseball game
2) Learn how to appreciate the Ballpark Experience
3) Learn how to listen to the radio broadcasts
4) Support your team no matter what
5) Play the game, embrace the game, be the game
6) Never give up hope, there is no time limit on the game, stay until the final out
You do not have to be the best player out there, if you have the passion, desire and love of this game. It will love you back and you will have fun playing in the sandlots or parks where you go. I honestly do not know where I would be without Baseball. In life there are decisions that we make, when I was young I turned to Baseball instead of turning to bad influences. During good times and bad times Baseball has helped me through them. I will forever be grateful and I will forever love Baseball...
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Future endeavours
Today I had to do something that I have not had done in a long time. I had to make the decision to "future endeavour" an employee. For those of you reading (which probably is not a lot..yet) when I say "future endeavour" I mean being terminated. The expression comes from the WWE. When they release a superstar they say "we wish them the best in their future endeavours", hence forth the reason I use it. Anyway, back to the point.
Making the decision to "future endeavours" an employee is sometimes an easy one, but a lot of the times it could be a very difficult decision. I remember when I worked for Starbucks I had to "future endeavor" a few people. Some were no doubt about it, while others were really tough decisions. Let me explain.
Here is an example of what I mean when an employee is a no doubt about it "future endeavor":
Comes in late, does not care about the quality of their work, disrupts and disturbs others, basically doing everything they can to be the opposite of what a good employee is. Now sometimes, hiring managers can spot potential bad employees, but every once in a while some slip through, either because they are good interviewers or even if they get good references from friends and other employees. When an employee shows a bad attitude towards their supervisor or even talks bad about their organization, that is when the beginning signs of departure happen.
Now an example of a difficult "future endeavour":
This is when you know the employee has so much potential. Works hard, goes above an beyond what you ask of them. Always there to help out in a jam. But can never be on time. Breaking the smallest of rules and getting written up for them. Do you let them slide because they have a great work record? or treat them like everyone else who barely skates by? Then there is the employee that does the minimum, just to get by. Doesn't try to do more then the job description and expects to be praised. But you can't let them go because they follow the rules. You can't just terminate someone without just cause, if you do, you are asking for trouble.
The "future endeavour" today was an easy one. The employee knew that it was coming. It's better when that happens because blind siding can really be messy. So what is my point to this. Well, I guess it would be that everyone works to the best of their abilities. No, wait that's not it. People tend to work to their happiness level. You know the saying "If you love what you do, you'll never work a day on your life" That rarely happens to any of us. My suggestion... If you are not happy with the job you have, make the best of it, work hard, show initiative and make a name for yourself. At the end of the day when you send out your resume or application it is YOUR name that is going on that paper. You owe it to yourself to learn, do and be the best at whatever it is you do.
I will admit that I sometimes forget to do that, work is stressful. Sometimes you give your all and get nothing in return, you see others not pulling their weight and they get the praise. I get it, I've been there. But then I think about who I am cheating if I do not give my best effort, I am cheating myself, because I build myself and my work experience and I try to build me as a brand.
Making the decision to "future endeavours" an employee is sometimes an easy one, but a lot of the times it could be a very difficult decision. I remember when I worked for Starbucks I had to "future endeavor" a few people. Some were no doubt about it, while others were really tough decisions. Let me explain.
Here is an example of what I mean when an employee is a no doubt about it "future endeavor":
Comes in late, does not care about the quality of their work, disrupts and disturbs others, basically doing everything they can to be the opposite of what a good employee is. Now sometimes, hiring managers can spot potential bad employees, but every once in a while some slip through, either because they are good interviewers or even if they get good references from friends and other employees. When an employee shows a bad attitude towards their supervisor or even talks bad about their organization, that is when the beginning signs of departure happen.
Now an example of a difficult "future endeavour":
This is when you know the employee has so much potential. Works hard, goes above an beyond what you ask of them. Always there to help out in a jam. But can never be on time. Breaking the smallest of rules and getting written up for them. Do you let them slide because they have a great work record? or treat them like everyone else who barely skates by? Then there is the employee that does the minimum, just to get by. Doesn't try to do more then the job description and expects to be praised. But you can't let them go because they follow the rules. You can't just terminate someone without just cause, if you do, you are asking for trouble.
The "future endeavour" today was an easy one. The employee knew that it was coming. It's better when that happens because blind siding can really be messy. So what is my point to this. Well, I guess it would be that everyone works to the best of their abilities. No, wait that's not it. People tend to work to their happiness level. You know the saying "If you love what you do, you'll never work a day on your life" That rarely happens to any of us. My suggestion... If you are not happy with the job you have, make the best of it, work hard, show initiative and make a name for yourself. At the end of the day when you send out your resume or application it is YOUR name that is going on that paper. You owe it to yourself to learn, do and be the best at whatever it is you do.
I will admit that I sometimes forget to do that, work is stressful. Sometimes you give your all and get nothing in return, you see others not pulling their weight and they get the praise. I get it, I've been there. But then I think about who I am cheating if I do not give my best effort, I am cheating myself, because I build myself and my work experience and I try to build me as a brand.
Monday, March 14, 2011
A Decade of me...
In 54 days I will close out one chapter in my life and turn the page to the next. On May 6, 2011 at 11:59:59 pm, I will turn the page on my twenties. At 12:00:00 am on May 7, 2011 I will begin a new chapter, my thirties. An end of a decade, a lot has happened between May 7, 2001 and May 7, 2011. There are many things that I have been able to do that I have been and I am truly proud of and of course there have been many things that I have done and haven't done that I am not so proud of. Thinking about the last decade of my life I have some moments that I would like to share with you, I will not go too much into detail with them, since there will be so many of them.
2001- June 30-met my future wife at my friends house
- July 16- officially became boyfriend/girlfriend via 'Thriller'
- September 11 - Tragedy strikes the US as the World Trade Center are attacked.
- My first day of work at Starbucks Coffee
- November - Friendship lost and lives changed.
2002- October 11- My Grandfather passes away
- October- San Francisco Giants make it to the World Series, do not win.
2003- April-September- San Francisco Giants go wire to wire, eliminated in NLDS
-Went to Hawaii with my Mom and Step dad and Amilcar
2004- June-Went to New York City to go to the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown.
Visited Statue of Liberty, 9/11 memorial, empire state building and Yankee Stadium
-September 6- William Narvaez Jr is born, my brother becomes a Dad, I become an Uncle again
2005- Moved out
-Went to Disneyland for the 50th Anniversary and for my Mom's Birthday
2006- May 2006- I receive my BA from SFSU
2007- August 7- Barry Bonds becomes the all time HR king
- My nephew Cesar is born in Nicaragua
-Attended weddings: Elmira and Wilmer; Oscar and Monica
-Talked to an old friend after 6 years
2008- April 15- Santiago Narvaez is born, second child for my brother
- June- My nephew Charles graduates from Jefferson High School
- August 8- Proposed to Ulisa at the ACME chophouse at 24 Willie Mays Plaza
- October- Went to New Orleans for a conference with Starbucks
2009- June 25- Michael Jackson-King of Pop passes away
-June 26- Ulisa and I get married at City Hall in San Francisco
July- Honeymoon in Nicaragua to visit my Dad and in-laws
-Attended the wedding of my sister Karen and Danny
- Future endeavoured by Starbucks
-Began working at Arriba Juntos
-Ulisa finally gets me on Facebook
2010-June 14 My niece/Goddaughter Alexia turns 13.. a teenager now
-Amilcar gets engaged to Olga
September 19- Charles turns 20
November 1- The San Francisco Giants win the World Series in 5 games
-Went to Disneyland to see Captain EO
-Went to Universal Studios and saw Alejandro Sanz in concert
-spent Valentine's day in Las Vegas
2011- January- Started my blog
-After 10 years, Oscar, Amilcar and me go hang out, just the three of us.
-January 26 Amilcar turned 30
February 5 - Got a picture with the Commissioners (World Series) trophy!
February- Officially joined Twitter
March 5- Alina and Juan get married
March- Charles gets drafted to play with the San Francisco Grays
These are just a few things that I can remember off the top of my head. I know that there are much more. I even may have some of the dates or years wrong, but I do know that these things happened and I enjoyed being a part of them. Yes, I did mention that there were things that I did that I was not too proud of, but I am not going to mention them here. Remember, the good times outweigh the bad. 10 years worth of memories and growth. I can only look back on this time and learn from it, share the memories that were made from it and share my stories for many years to come.
What do the next 10 years have for me? A church wedding for sure, Honeymoon in Cancun, Children soon? (I hope) and maybe some more World Series titles. What I want is a new job with better pay (don't we all?) and to win the Lotto! but seriously, the next 10 years I wish are filled with love, family, friends, success and happiness.
2001- June 30-met my future wife at my friends house
- July 16- officially became boyfriend/girlfriend via 'Thriller'
- September 11 - Tragedy strikes the US as the World Trade Center are attacked.
- My first day of work at Starbucks Coffee
- November - Friendship lost and lives changed.
2002- October 11- My Grandfather passes away
- October- San Francisco Giants make it to the World Series, do not win.
2003- April-September- San Francisco Giants go wire to wire, eliminated in NLDS
-Went to Hawaii with my Mom and Step dad and Amilcar
2004- June-Went to New York City to go to the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown.
Visited Statue of Liberty, 9/11 memorial, empire state building and Yankee Stadium
-September 6- William Narvaez Jr is born, my brother becomes a Dad, I become an Uncle again
2005- Moved out
-Went to Disneyland for the 50th Anniversary and for my Mom's Birthday
2006- May 2006- I receive my BA from SFSU
2007- August 7- Barry Bonds becomes the all time HR king
- My nephew Cesar is born in Nicaragua
-Attended weddings: Elmira and Wilmer; Oscar and Monica
-Talked to an old friend after 6 years
2008- April 15- Santiago Narvaez is born, second child for my brother
- June- My nephew Charles graduates from Jefferson High School
- August 8- Proposed to Ulisa at the ACME chophouse at 24 Willie Mays Plaza
- October- Went to New Orleans for a conference with Starbucks
2009- June 25- Michael Jackson-King of Pop passes away
-June 26- Ulisa and I get married at City Hall in San Francisco
July- Honeymoon in Nicaragua to visit my Dad and in-laws
-Attended the wedding of my sister Karen and Danny
- Future endeavoured by Starbucks
-Began working at Arriba Juntos
-Ulisa finally gets me on Facebook
2010-June 14 My niece/Goddaughter Alexia turns 13.. a teenager now
-Amilcar gets engaged to Olga
September 19- Charles turns 20
November 1- The San Francisco Giants win the World Series in 5 games
-Went to Disneyland to see Captain EO
-Went to Universal Studios and saw Alejandro Sanz in concert
-spent Valentine's day in Las Vegas
2011- January- Started my blog
-After 10 years, Oscar, Amilcar and me go hang out, just the three of us.
-January 26 Amilcar turned 30
February 5 - Got a picture with the Commissioners (World Series) trophy!
February- Officially joined Twitter
March 5- Alina and Juan get married
March- Charles gets drafted to play with the San Francisco Grays
These are just a few things that I can remember off the top of my head. I know that there are much more. I even may have some of the dates or years wrong, but I do know that these things happened and I enjoyed being a part of them. Yes, I did mention that there were things that I did that I was not too proud of, but I am not going to mention them here. Remember, the good times outweigh the bad. 10 years worth of memories and growth. I can only look back on this time and learn from it, share the memories that were made from it and share my stories for many years to come.
What do the next 10 years have for me? A church wedding for sure, Honeymoon in Cancun, Children soon? (I hope) and maybe some more World Series titles. What I want is a new job with better pay (don't we all?) and to win the Lotto! but seriously, the next 10 years I wish are filled with love, family, friends, success and happiness.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
It is what it is...
I am a very lucky man, I have a great wife, family and friends. Today I was thinking about a lot of things that happened to family and friends and even to current and past co-workers and it made me think of someone. A great influence in my life, my Father. My Father is a great man, he was always there for me, he made sure that I had what was needed and in most cases made sure I got the things I wanted. It's funny, that I hear most people say that they could only appreciate what their Father did for them after they had children of their own. But I don't see it that way.
I remember my Father taking me with him to work in Larkspur, waking up early and going there to hang out and run around the area while he worked. I also remember going to Giants games with him, how we had a season ticket pack for the Giants last season at Candlestick and the first time we went to Pacific Bell Park. He took me to wrestling events, movies, my sports games, baseball games, football games and too many other things to mention. One of the things I remember was playing card games with him and having a best of seven series that I called the World Series. I have always had a great relationship with my Father, even when we are mad at each other we don't stay mad too long.
I try to call my Father everyday, sometimes he will call first. We joke around and although he is in Nicaragua it's like he is here. When he visits, I try to visit him everyday that I can. My Father has trouble walking and it does hurt me to see him this way. I pray every night that somehow he will get better and walk normally again.
So, the reason that I wanted to write this 1) to give a shout out to my awesome Father (Thanks Dad) and 2) to write about a little of what he did and to make a statement to "Father's". so here goes...
Only because you can have children does not make you a "Father"! being a "Father" is much more then being a sperm donor. It's more then talking about what you are going to do, making shirts, tattoos, buying signs, posting pictures on Facebook, Twitter or anything of that sort. Boasting about what you supposed to do as a "Father" needs a "Dislike" button! It's like people who want credit for showing up to work on time, it is what you are supposed to do. I hear so called "Father's" say "I love my daughter, I would do anything for her" and then are no where to be found when they baby needs milk, a car seat, clothes, to be changed or just to even play. It is disheartening to know that there are good people out in the world who struggle with fertility and cannot have their own children, who would gladly get the milk, buy the car seat, clothes, change the baby and to play with their children. And people take it for granted.
Have a positive male role model can do so much for a child. Boys can take the example that their "Father" gives them and expand on it to grow and be a better Man and "Father". Girls can take the example their "Father" give them and see that there are true Men out there who will treat her with dignity and respect.
For every time you don't follow through on promises, or miss out on their game, too busy to play, yell at them because you forget that they are children, treat them bad out of frustration it only builds resentment and pain. I thank God everyday that I did not have to go through that. The worst thing a guy can do is treat his children like they don't matter, you should thank God that you have a healthy child that you can help guide through this world and make that your priority. I think that it is sad when going to a club, bar, party, movie or even a ball game is more important then spending time with your children. Don't get me wrong, we all our own time to do what we have to do, but nothing should be more important then that quality time with your kids.
I wrote the following from a perspective of children who don't have that 'Father' in their lives
"I looked around and you were no longer there,
it made wonder if you even cared?
You tell me time and again that you'll be there,
but when I take that swing, I look back and still you're not there.
Actions speak louder then words, and what you do says a lot.
I am tired of hurting because you feel that I am not worth the drive.
Because of your selfishness we have this divide,
did you know that because of your actions I will develop a complex deep inside?
At least I will have a chance to do better for my kids, I won't lie to them like you did.
I know how it feels to have my heart broken, I would never want my kids to feel the way
you made me feel and then made me feel bad for it.
I wish you could feel the hurt I have when I see other kids playing with their Dad,
it's just sad that you never learned to be a 'Father', never attended to your son or daughter.
But there is one thing that I can thank you for, is for showing me what it's like to not be
a 'Father', so I can make sure that I am always there for my sons and daughters.
I remember my Father taking me with him to work in Larkspur, waking up early and going there to hang out and run around the area while he worked. I also remember going to Giants games with him, how we had a season ticket pack for the Giants last season at Candlestick and the first time we went to Pacific Bell Park. He took me to wrestling events, movies, my sports games, baseball games, football games and too many other things to mention. One of the things I remember was playing card games with him and having a best of seven series that I called the World Series. I have always had a great relationship with my Father, even when we are mad at each other we don't stay mad too long.
I try to call my Father everyday, sometimes he will call first. We joke around and although he is in Nicaragua it's like he is here. When he visits, I try to visit him everyday that I can. My Father has trouble walking and it does hurt me to see him this way. I pray every night that somehow he will get better and walk normally again.
So, the reason that I wanted to write this 1) to give a shout out to my awesome Father (Thanks Dad) and 2) to write about a little of what he did and to make a statement to "Father's". so here goes...
Only because you can have children does not make you a "Father"! being a "Father" is much more then being a sperm donor. It's more then talking about what you are going to do, making shirts, tattoos, buying signs, posting pictures on Facebook, Twitter or anything of that sort. Boasting about what you supposed to do as a "Father" needs a "Dislike" button! It's like people who want credit for showing up to work on time, it is what you are supposed to do. I hear so called "Father's" say "I love my daughter, I would do anything for her" and then are no where to be found when they baby needs milk, a car seat, clothes, to be changed or just to even play. It is disheartening to know that there are good people out in the world who struggle with fertility and cannot have their own children, who would gladly get the milk, buy the car seat, clothes, change the baby and to play with their children. And people take it for granted.
Have a positive male role model can do so much for a child. Boys can take the example that their "Father" gives them and expand on it to grow and be a better Man and "Father". Girls can take the example their "Father" give them and see that there are true Men out there who will treat her with dignity and respect.
For every time you don't follow through on promises, or miss out on their game, too busy to play, yell at them because you forget that they are children, treat them bad out of frustration it only builds resentment and pain. I thank God everyday that I did not have to go through that. The worst thing a guy can do is treat his children like they don't matter, you should thank God that you have a healthy child that you can help guide through this world and make that your priority. I think that it is sad when going to a club, bar, party, movie or even a ball game is more important then spending time with your children. Don't get me wrong, we all our own time to do what we have to do, but nothing should be more important then that quality time with your kids.
I wrote the following from a perspective of children who don't have that 'Father' in their lives
"I looked around and you were no longer there,
it made wonder if you even cared?
You tell me time and again that you'll be there,
but when I take that swing, I look back and still you're not there.
Actions speak louder then words, and what you do says a lot.
I am tired of hurting because you feel that I am not worth the drive.
Because of your selfishness we have this divide,
did you know that because of your actions I will develop a complex deep inside?
At least I will have a chance to do better for my kids, I won't lie to them like you did.
I know how it feels to have my heart broken, I would never want my kids to feel the way
you made me feel and then made me feel bad for it.
I wish you could feel the hurt I have when I see other kids playing with their Dad,
it's just sad that you never learned to be a 'Father', never attended to your son or daughter.
But there is one thing that I can thank you for, is for showing me what it's like to not be
a 'Father', so I can make sure that I am always there for my sons and daughters.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Decision: The act or process of deciding
In life we are all faced with decisions. Every decision we make can alter what we have in store for the future. Decisions like: Do I study hard, get good grades and gain in depth knowledge to help me for my future career? or Do I slack off or even drop out because I feel school is useless? Do I accept this job over that one? Do I move out on my own? Should I take the chance to ask her out? Should I finally grow up and be an adult?
In life there are moments where we must decide what is best for us, moments where we need to decide where we go and what we will do. Some decisions are great decisions. Like when you finally accept a job offer, asking for her hand in marriage, deciding to start a family. On the other hand there are times when we make bad decisions. When we make a bad decision, it does not only effect you, but it effects everyone around you. Bad decisions can bring on anger, sadness and tears.
Everyday I hear people talk about how they are looking for work to help support their family, that they would do anything and everything for their family and that they want to be there to help raise their family. But when it comes time to walk the walk, it turns out it was all talk.
When do we begin to take accountability for our actions, you can only be in the wrong place at the wrong time, so many times. When do you realize that maybe it is your decision making skills that have put you in this position.
I'll admit, I am to blame for a lot of things, I wish I had more courage and conviction to tell the people that I love that there is something wrong. We let things go on for too long without saying what needs to be said. I hear the things that going they are through, the actions and decisions they make and I remain quiet. I always figured it was none of my business and if they want my opinion, they would ask. Many of us, including myself do not really speak up because we know the person we want to say things to cannot handle it well. For me, I fear that I may lose the closeness that I have had with people, but slowly it seems like they are going out of their heads.
There is one thing I do know, that life moves on. When we make good decisions or bad decisions, nothing stops. We tend to blame others for our shortcomings, we build up walls of excuses to justify when we make bad choices. We almost expect every one's world to stop just for us.
The most I can do is hope that the people I love make the right choices, I only hope that one day we can all talk openly and listen to each other before it is too late. I know that I have my faults and that there are many things that people would love to tell me. I have heard suggestions from people and I try to change for the better, which I can only hope that others are trying to do that to.
The decisions we make today, be it good or bad, effect what happens tomorrow and beyond. If we are not realizing that the mistakes in judgement that we have are hurting the people we love and hurting yourself, then we all have a lot of work to do. I am not perfect and I do not claim to be (well, at least not in a serious conversation) I still need to grow and still need to make decisions that will effect my future, my wife and I need to make decisions that will shape our future for us and our children. The one decision I know that I can commit to is, to at least try to change my faults and make them into positives and to take in account how will this effect my future, my wife, my children, my family and friends.
In life there are moments where we must decide what is best for us, moments where we need to decide where we go and what we will do. Some decisions are great decisions. Like when you finally accept a job offer, asking for her hand in marriage, deciding to start a family. On the other hand there are times when we make bad decisions. When we make a bad decision, it does not only effect you, but it effects everyone around you. Bad decisions can bring on anger, sadness and tears.
Everyday I hear people talk about how they are looking for work to help support their family, that they would do anything and everything for their family and that they want to be there to help raise their family. But when it comes time to walk the walk, it turns out it was all talk.
When do we begin to take accountability for our actions, you can only be in the wrong place at the wrong time, so many times. When do you realize that maybe it is your decision making skills that have put you in this position.
I'll admit, I am to blame for a lot of things, I wish I had more courage and conviction to tell the people that I love that there is something wrong. We let things go on for too long without saying what needs to be said. I hear the things that going they are through, the actions and decisions they make and I remain quiet. I always figured it was none of my business and if they want my opinion, they would ask. Many of us, including myself do not really speak up because we know the person we want to say things to cannot handle it well. For me, I fear that I may lose the closeness that I have had with people, but slowly it seems like they are going out of their heads.
There is one thing I do know, that life moves on. When we make good decisions or bad decisions, nothing stops. We tend to blame others for our shortcomings, we build up walls of excuses to justify when we make bad choices. We almost expect every one's world to stop just for us.
The most I can do is hope that the people I love make the right choices, I only hope that one day we can all talk openly and listen to each other before it is too late. I know that I have my faults and that there are many things that people would love to tell me. I have heard suggestions from people and I try to change for the better, which I can only hope that others are trying to do that to.
The decisions we make today, be it good or bad, effect what happens tomorrow and beyond. If we are not realizing that the mistakes in judgement that we have are hurting the people we love and hurting yourself, then we all have a lot of work to do. I am not perfect and I do not claim to be (well, at least not in a serious conversation) I still need to grow and still need to make decisions that will effect my future, my wife and I need to make decisions that will shape our future for us and our children. The one decision I know that I can commit to is, to at least try to change my faults and make them into positives and to take in account how will this effect my future, my wife, my children, my family and friends.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Dedicated to all...
I wrote this today with a few people in mind. I realize that I have used a lot of hurtful words and said too many hurtful jokes to the people I love. I just wanted them to know that I am trying to be more sensitive to that fact that words do hurt, that words to remain with you and that resentment grows and because of this relationships can diminish. The worst thing I could experience is losing the people I love in life. So this one is for you, I wrote it thinking about you and how I only could imagine your perspective...If I ever did or said anything to hurt any of you I truly am sorry...I hope you have noticed that I have changed...
Title: Definition of Me...
"How could I let you make me feel so weak and insecure?
How could I let your words define who I am?
When you call me names it starts the cycle of pain.
I try to hide my emotions deep inside, but my biggest fear is one day my resentment towards you will arise.
I know you may say that you tease me out of "love",
that I should not take your words too "serious", because your words were said out of "fun"
But let me ask you a question, who was it "fun" for?
I spend days agonizing, nights crying and feeling alone.
With no one to turn to, my concerns are never heard.
Even if I told you how I felt, you would just mock me in return.
If you were in my shoes I know you would feel the same,
would you just "get over it"?
or would it continue to play over and over in your head.
If you were in my shoes I just know you would feel the same,
then maybe, just maybe you would understand why I am in pain.
I need to turn myself around, I know it's easier said then done.
But I need to proud of myself and who I have become.
I will not let you make me feel weak any longer,
I will not let you make me feel insecure,
your words will never define me anymore.
I am strong, intelligent and you can no loner hurt me.
I just need to realize that only I can define ME!"
-There it is, I hope you enjoyed it. Until next time....
Title: Definition of Me...
"How could I let you make me feel so weak and insecure?
How could I let your words define who I am?
When you call me names it starts the cycle of pain.
I try to hide my emotions deep inside, but my biggest fear is one day my resentment towards you will arise.
I know you may say that you tease me out of "love",
that I should not take your words too "serious", because your words were said out of "fun"
But let me ask you a question, who was it "fun" for?
I spend days agonizing, nights crying and feeling alone.
With no one to turn to, my concerns are never heard.
Even if I told you how I felt, you would just mock me in return.
If you were in my shoes I know you would feel the same,
would you just "get over it"?
or would it continue to play over and over in your head.
If you were in my shoes I just know you would feel the same,
then maybe, just maybe you would understand why I am in pain.
I need to turn myself around, I know it's easier said then done.
But I need to proud of myself and who I have become.
I will not let you make me feel weak any longer,
I will not let you make me feel insecure,
your words will never define me anymore.
I am strong, intelligent and you can no loner hurt me.
I just need to realize that only I can define ME!"
-There it is, I hope you enjoyed it. Until next time....
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