closing ceremonies

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got ready to head out to te closing ceremonies. Javi stepped up and went first in his division home run derby. It was a bit of a mess. He hit 2 to the outfield,  none out of the park. But I'm super proud that he tried. After we went to Gabriel's home run derby. He hit 6 in the 1st round, 5 in te 2nd round to be the home run derby champ. We went to get the announcement that  Gabe will represent the league as a part of the Jerry Barry All Stars.

(Morning: water)

Afternoon:

Had lunch, came home and napped. Went out to get ice cream, I didn't have any. Came home and chilled.

(Afternoon: steak salad,  beer, water, rolls)

Nighttime:

Had Gabe to 3 rounds of BP with his new bat. Played pickle. Washed clothes and showered. Now watching tv. 

(Nighttime: beer, hot dog, onion rings, chicken fries, water)

party time

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Took the boys to school. Picked up coffee and came home to do a training. It was good, now waiting for the PM one.

(Morning: water. Caramel Macchiato)

Afternoon:

Took a nap, had lunch, did the 2nd training. It was good. Logged off work and went to a birthday party. 

(Afternoon: spaghetti and meatballs, water)

Nighttime:

Left my wife and Gabe at the party. Took Javi to his end of season party. Picked them up, came home and showered. Had some ice cream and now hanging out. 

(Nighttime: pizza, chips, 7-up, water. Ice cream)

derby practice

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got the boys ready and tool them to school. Came home and had breakfast. Logged in to work and got ready for training. It was good. After we had a meeting.

(Morning: water. Coffee. McDonald's breakfast)

Afternoon:

Went to khols to return a bat. Went to Walmart to get some items and came home to make lunch. Picked up the boys. Finished work and had the boys get ready to go to a home run derby practice. 

(Afternoon: coke, poverty nachos, oreos)

Nighttime:

The practice was fun. Came home and had dinner. Showered and now watching tv. Tomorrow we have 2 trainings.

(Nighttime: water. Spaghetti and meatballs, cereal, wine)

hump day

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Drove to Bayfair BART and took the train to work. Got there and set up. Logged in and attended forum. After had a chat with Linda and studied the whole morning.

(Morning: water, coffee, cookie)

Afternoon:

Had lunch and chilled. When I was done working I walked over to BART to come home to pick up Gabe for practice. 

(Afternoon: tuna sandwich,  peanut butter cups,  water)

Nighttime:

Practice was good. Came home, went to Target. Came home and showered  now watching tv.

(Nighttime: Arroz a la Valenciana, beer. Water)

back in office

Morning:

Woke up, got dressed and drove to Bayfair BART. Caught the train and got to work. Walked over to my desk and set up. Had a meeting and got ready for bfor lunch.

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Had lunch with Amilcar and ot back to the building. Did some more work before coming home.

(Afternoon: water, sandwich)

Nighttime:

Played in tbe back with the boys. Showered,  got ready for tomorrow. Going to bed soon.

(Nighttime: torta de carne, water, coke, quesadillas. Onion rings)

day off

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got Gabe ready and took him to his 1st  travel ball team practice. It was good, I stayed a bit and had to leave to go deal with the car thing.

(Morning: water)

Afternoon:

Came home and waited. Did some laundry,  the Carvana guy came by and e checked out the pathfinder and they accepted and took it. It was sad to see it go, but I'm glad they took it. One less thing to worry about. We went to eat lunch and went to see if we could find Gabe's travel bat and uniform items.

(Afternoon: salad, fries, burger, chips, guacamole, coke, water)

Nighttime:

Didn't find the bat, found the socks. While we were at Chuck E Cheese my sister told us she got te bat for Gabe. We came home, practiced a bit and now going to shower before bed.

(Nighttime: water. Margarita)

Birthday party

Morning:

Woke up and showered. Took the car to get detailed and came home. We went to return an item a Khol's and drove down to Daly City. 

(Morning: Caramel Macchiato,  lemon loaf. Water)

Afternoon:

Went to Dick's to get a gift card, drove over to Arnel's for is birthday party. Had some food and a good time. Drove back home.

(Afternoon: water, coke, food)

Nighttime:

Got home ans did some laundry. Went to watch Final Destination Bloodlines and came home. Now watching tv until bed time.

(Nighttime: water, coke, popcorn)

car

Morning:

Woke up and showered. Got ready to go watch the Lilo & Stitch movie. We got there and watched the movie and after drove home.

(Morning: water. Popcorn, coke)

Afternoon:

Came home and cleaned out the truck. We went to Nissan to see if we were going to buy a new car. 

(Afternoon: water)

Nighttime:

Still at the dealership and we purchased a 2025 Nissan Pathfinder.  Came home and grabbed dinner. Now relaxing. Trying to sell the old truck vis carvana. Let's see what happens.

(Nighttime: water, Bento box, margaritas)

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End of the season party

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Ot the boys ready and we took them to school. Went to watch the new Mission Impossible movie and we enjoyed it.

(Morning: water, breakfast bagel)

Afternoon:

Came home.and went to pick up lunch. Ate and took a nap. Got things ready so we could go buy ice and go.to the end of the season party.

We got there and set up, had some food and chilled.

(Afternoon: water. Wings fries, ribs. Beer)

Nighttime:

The event was fun. We gave away trophies and certificates. Had some more drinks and ate some more. Came home and showered. Now watching TV until bed time.

(Nighttime: beer, water cupcake, snacks)

Thursday

Morning:

Woke up amd changed. Took the boys to school and came home. Logged in to work and waited for a meeting.  The meeting was good, but it was long. We had to pick up later 

(Morning: water. Coffee, donut)

Afternoon:

Had a Thai Iced tea, picked up the boys, had lunch and finished work. Chilled and we to practice with the boys in the backyard. 

(Afternoon: water, tacos, Thai Iced tea)

Nighttime:

Did some hitting, catching and pitching. Had some beers, showered and now watching tv.

(Nighttime: water, beer, pasta, peanut butter cups)

Try outs

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Headed over to BART. The trains were working today, slow but it got me to work. Walked over to my desk and waited for a meeting. We finished up the PowerPoint and I waited to get the nachos I ordered.  

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Had the nachos and a coke. My unit mate got me an iced coffee for my birthday. Started getting the excel sheet ready for a split. Grabbed my things and headed home to get Gabriel to go to a try out for a travel ball team.

(Afternoon: water coke, iced coffee, nachos)

Nighttime:

Gabriel did well, so did the other kids. I got gas at Costco. We got a call tat Gabriel was selected for one of the two open spots. So he will be on a travel team. Washing clothes and going to bed soon.

(Nighttime: Chicken Gnocchi soup, donut, beer, water)

Issues

Morning:

Woke up and changed. BART had an issue and shut down the trains that where going in my direction. So I picked up some donuts and came home. Took the boys to school and worked from home. Had a meeting and updated some documents. 

(Morning: water. Coffee. Donuts)

Afternoon:

Had lunch, picked up the boys. Finished work and played pickle with the boys. After we went to Target. 

(Afternoon: nachos, water)

Nighttime:

Had dinner and took a shower. Watched the Giants game and now watching tv.

(Nighttime: Tacos, chips, water)

Last game

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Had my game shirt on and went over to BART. Caught the train and headed to the city. Got there and walked to my building. Set up and had a meeting, pretty chill Morning. 

(Morning: water coffee)

Afternoon:

Met Karla for lunch and came back to my desk. Looked at some documents and finished a task I was assigned. After I left to catch the BART to go home to go to Gabriel's game. 

(Afternoon: teriyaki chicken, avocado maki, water. Chips, rice, salad. Miso soup)

Nighttime:

The warm-up was worrisome, the kids were not ready for today. I tried to get them hyped with a speech that this is the last game and to leave it on the field. They looked defeated for the first 3 innings, but we got a lead and they Woke up. Gabe closed the game out with 3 solid innings. We won 5-3. Came home, had dinner and showered. 

(Nighttime: water, beer, nachos, tacos)

Doubt.. Entry 5

 It's been a rough few weeks for me, the issues with the truck, the stress of planning the 1st communion party, work adding a 4th in office day and life really. I don't know, it's getting harder to be positive about things and enjoy things to the fullest. Yesterday we went to the Giants game, where they swept the A's. It was fun but things that happened reminded me of what my role is within my family. 

In the morning I woke up early and alone put the tables, chairs and other things away in the shed. Started moving the jumper so it could continue to dry. Got ready to go and when I wanted to start warming up the car, since others weren't ready I was given attitude for trying to leave when we said we were going to go. The drive down was smooth and we got to our parking spot, which was a good price. Maybe a 5-10 minute walk from the stadium. Once again, attitude given to me because of where we parked. I paid $26 for the spot, they were listed at $40 and above for the same spot. 

We go and see the Q&A for the Little League day, use the restroom and went to go line up for the Little League Day parade. Javi was ok with the waiting but Gabe was acting up and I get that it was a long time, he was being way too much. After we walked around the field we entered the stadium and we had agreed to meet in the concourse of our section, but I guess that they wanted me to meet them at a different location. While I asked the boys to wait for them they started acting out like they hadn't eaten in 2 days so I got them food. 

After we made the way to our seats, again there was some chatter about the seats. Then we had to go get food and ice cream and I missed part of the game. I tried to see if they wanted something else that was quicker, but nope, they didn't care. So I had to wait and miss the game. When I got to my seat I saw that they drank all the water I had packed up for us without a thought about is I had mine or if I wanted water and I was upset, but of course, that was my fault that I was upset that they took my water. 

The walk back to the car was more of the same. Complaining about the walk. When we got home I offered to make the boys chicken tacos, they said no. So when I was done making food for me and my wife and ready to eat.. here they come out to ask for chicken tacos. So I had to do that at the same time while eating. The boys went out to do some hitting off a tee and practice pitching.

After some time Gabriel was getting mad and because I wasn't making things easy for him he started yelling and he destroyed my Giants hat. All because he cannot control his anger. I was really mad and went for a walk. It made me wonder if me being a coach for them is causing these issues and I'm considering not coaching anymore because of it.

Here is the thing, because the boys were upset, my wife was upset and all of it was my fault again. My fault that they don't have any consideration for me, my fault they don't listen, my fault that they are mad that I'm mad that they are disrespectful. 

I'm doubting so many things right now, it's very frustrating. I feel like I have no support, but I continue to support everyone. So I don't know, I'm pretty much done with all of it. Maybe I continue coaching, maybe I don't, I have to see what is going to be better for my relationships. One thing I feel is that the lack of support and consideration is not going to change. One thing I know for sure is that no one cares....

little league day

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Put some items away and got everyone in the car to go to the Giants game. We made it down there quick and walked over. We saw a bit of the Q&A but after went to stand in line with some of the other coaches and players from our league.

(Morning: water)

Afternoon:

We were able to walk along the warning track on the field and after got in. Grabbed some food and enjoyed the game. After we drove home.

(Afternoon: coke, garlic fries, chips, water)

Nighttime:

Got home and had dinner, took another walk and now going to shower and finish laundry before bed.

(Nighttime: Tacos, nachos, beer, soda, water)

1st communion

Morning:

Woke up and went to take things out of the storage to set up for the party. Showered and changed. Headed to the church. It was a wonderful ceremony. Gabriel looked great and did great. After we came home to set up .

(Morning: water)

Afternoon:

Picked up the food and ate. People came over and we chilled and played games. It was a great time celebrating Gabriel.

(Afternoon: Tacos, chips, rice, beans, cake, water, beer)

Nighttime:

Cleaned up and had a fun time with everyone before they left. Leaving some items to clean up for tomorrow. Tired. Early wake up time tomorrow. Giants game.

(Nighttime: water, chips)

What a game

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got the boys ready and took them to school. Passed by Starbucks and grabbed some coffee before work. Logged in and had a meeting pretty chill day.

(Morning: waterz Caramel Macchiato)

Afternoon:

Did some laundry,  had some food went to panda express to get lunch. Came home and ate. Went to get the boys and got Javi ready for his game. We drove over and he warmed up.

(Afternoon: water, coke, Panda express,  egggs)

Nighttime:

The game was exciting. Javi's team was down 7 in the bottom of te 6th. They scored 8 and walked them off. After we came home and chilled. 

(Nighttime: orange chicken, beer, water)

last practice

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Had the boys get ready for school and took them. Picked up breakfast at McDonald's and came home to eat and log in to work. Had a meeting and a pretty good morning. 

(Morning: water. Coffee, McDonald's)

Afternoon:

Warmed up te lasagna and turned on the jumper so it could dry up. Wet the grass and moved a table. Went to pick up the boys and came back home go to one more meeting. 

(Afternoon: zoa, water, reeses pieces, lasagna)

Nighttime:

Took the boys to practice and we had fun. We played parents vs kids kickball. After we came home to drop off the boys, had some food and now relaxing. 

(Nighttime : water, ceviche, chips, cereal)

Reconciliation

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got the boys ready and tool them to school. Picked up Starbucks on the way home. Logged in and logged out at 9:30. Drove to the church and sat to support Gabriel and his 2nd grade class during the reconciliation event. After grabbed Javi and came home.

(Morning: coffee, Caramel Macchiato, water)

Afternoon:

Order pizza and picked it up. Hit up the dollar tree and Cardenas. Took a nap while the boys played in the back. Went to Costco and came home.

(Afternoon: water, pizza, coke)

Nighttime:

Practiced with te boys and listened to music. Came in and had them shower. I showered and had some nachos. Now relaxing until bed time.

(Nighttime: water, beer, nachos, pizza)

cages

Morning:

Woke up ans changed. Got my things ready and headed out to BART. Caught the train and headed to the city. Got there and walked to my desk. Pretty chill day. 

(Morning: water. Coffee, chocolate bar, Madeline)

Afternoon:

Walked over to Manora and met Kathleen and Alson for lunch. Had a good meal and good conversation. After I walked back to my desk and finished work.

(Afternoon: Thai Iced Tea, duck, rice, water)

Nighttime:

Got home and we went over to Manny's hose to help build a batting cae. Had dinner and agreed on the end of season awards. Came home to shower and chill before bed.

(Nighttime: water, Agua fresca, tacos)

Game day

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Headed off to work and passed by Peet's grabbing my birthday reward drink. Got to my desk and had breakfast. Read some emails and chilled.

(Morning: water, coffee, chorizo and egg flat bread)

Afternoon:

Had lunch and attended a meeting. When it was close to time to go i packed my things and headed over to BART. Caught the train home and drove to the ballpark.

(Afternoon: water, cup of noodles, banana, Madeline, apple)

Nighttime:

Got to the game to warm the kids up. They were slow out the gate, but got it together. They won 9-5. Came home, took out the trash, recycling and compost. Showered,  had dinner, now hanging out until bed time.

(Nighttime: water, pizza, corn dogs)

I don't know anymore.. Entry 4

 So it's been a rough few weeks for us. The Pathfinder has decided to just die on us. We spent close to $3,000 on it to change the alternator, transmission fluid and filter, oil change, breaks and tires, just for the transmission to go out. We have taken it to different places and we get these crazy quotes and that doesn't mean the truck will work for many years, it just means it can work now and can last, but not for sure. I've reached out to the dealership to see what they could do for us in terms of a replacement transmission and they haven't returned my calls or emails so that is a bit concerning.

It looks like we are going to be in the market for a new car. I'm super stressed here because bills keep piling up and now this would be more to pay, things are getting super expensive and although I am trying to change my habits, there are things that my family wants to do and there is not enough to go around some times. 

Some times it feels that everyone would be better off without me here, like, they could thrive and go on with their lives and I won't be holding anyone back or be a burden. Like yesterday, I made a reservation to a restaurant for Mother's day. It was packed and busy but all I heard from my table was how slow it was, how it was not good portion, how they were disappointed and that completely sucked. It's like I was getting blamed for things that are out of my control, which happens a lot.

I don't know what it is but it always seems that way. Like I'm everyone's punching bag. Things go wrong, it's my fault. The boys are acting up, it's my fault. Everything gets pushed off on me like if I'm the one that caused the issues. That's why I'm feeling this way like I'm holding everyone back, like they can do more and be more without me. 

Right now for me it's not a really good time to be alone with my thoughts, they can get dark, but I try to pull through and try to do the best I can, I'm just not feeling like what I'm doing is helping anyone right now. I don't know, it will pass, this will pass, we will get by.

mother's day

Morning:

Woke up and started to move the jumper. Had the boys play in it for a bit before turning it off. Mowed the grass and set up a few things. Had breakfast and started laundry. Took a shower and got ready to go.

(Morning: coffee, water. Pancakes)

Afternoon:

Watched some of the Giants game and drove to Horatio's. Had mother's day lunch and came home. Dropped off my family and went to put as in the camry. Came home to fold clothes and rest. Gabriel want to play catch and after they wanted to play basketball. 

(Afternoon: Cesar salad, water. Clam chowder, prime rib. Mashed potatoes,  creme Brule, bread)

Nighttime:

Finishing laundry. Had some wine and beer. Watching tv until bed time

(Nighttime: water, wine. Beer)

Game day

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Made breakfast for the boys. Had coffee and loaded up the camry. Headed out to the ballpark for umpiring and then the mother's day games. Umpiring was fun, I guess I missed a call, but it happens. After went to go warm up our team.

(Morning: water, coffee, donut)

Afternoon:

We won 12-2, Gabe got 2 hits, made some good plays. Javi's team lost. But he played well. After we went to union city for a birthday BBQ for my nephew who turns 1 on Tuesday. 

(Afternoon: iced coffee. Water. Burger, hot link, spam, rice, macaroni salad)

Nighttime:

Came home to make chicharron and chilled. Showered and caught up on wrestling. Now going to bed.

(Nighttime: chicharron,  beer, water)

practice... again

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Took the boys to school and came home to work. Had a meeting and finished up a power point. 

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Made meatloaf and picked up the boys. Had lunch and finished work. Got Javi ready for practice. My sister called me to tell me that my uncle in Montreal passed away. He was the last surviving brother to my Dad.

(Afternoon: meatloaf, rice,  water, zoa)

Nighttime:

Practice was fun, participated today to help out. Came home to drop off Javi and went to Target

 About to shower and chill until bed time.

(Nighttime: wine. Snacks)

Practice

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Got the boys ready and took them to school. Came back home to make coffee and log in to work. Reviewed some items before having a meeting. The meeting was a bit long, but we got a lot done.

(Morning: water. Coffee, peanut butter cups)

Afternoon:

Walked over to Popeye's to pick up lunch. Had a chicken sandwich and went to get the boys. Came home and got Gabriel ready for practice. Logged off work. Played pickle  before going.

(Afternoon: Chicken sandwich,  coke, water)

Nighttime:

Practice was good, came home, had dinner and showered. Now watching TV.

(Nighttime: Chicken, cake, water)

Birthday

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Made lunch for the boys, my wife took them to school while I drove to a place to check the transmission of te truck. They confirmed the issue and said we would need a new one. Went to get a second quote and they were outrageous. So we might just get a new car.

Hit up Target to get Carlos a gift and some Starbucks. 

(Morning: water. Coffee)

Afternoon: 

Drove to San Jose to have dim sum. Drove back home and on the way stopped at Costco. Grabbed a few items and came home to cut the grass in the front yard. Tomorrow or Friday I'll do the back yard. Got Gabriel ready for his game in Treeview.

(Afternoon: water, cake, dim sum)

Nighttime:

The game was good. Gabriel played 3rd base and Center Fiels. He made 3 great plays at 3rd. He got a hit and 2 home runs for the game. We won. After the game they gave me a poster for my birthday,  all the boys signed it and so did the team mom's, Javi and my wife. After came home to have dinner and shower. Going to bed. Back to work tomorrow. 

(Nighttime: water, cupcake, shrimp pasta, bread, beer)

As always, thanking God for another year of life. Things are not going well, but I have faith they will turn around 

working from home

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Took the boys to school. Came home to log in to work. Took a quick break to take the car to get checked and came back to finish some work and go to a meeting. Close to 12 we went over to take the car to another shop. 

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Had lunch and finished work. Went to pick up the truck, the transmission is messed up. Tomorrow we take it to a specialist.  My Mom, sister and brother in law came over and we had dinner.

(Afternoon: water. Rice, meat. Cheese its)

Nighttime:

Had dinner and cake. Played pickle with the boys. Showered, watched te Giants game and took a shower. Now watching TV until bed time. Feeling really down about te potential cost of the truck and the ramifications of the price.

(Nighttime: water, lemonade,  bread, pasta, shrimp, cake)

in office

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Grabbed my things and headed to work. Caught the train and got there. Set up and reviewed a lot of documents. Had a meeting and went to lunch.

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Had lunch and had another meeting. After came home and took out the trash. Went to Javi's game.

(Afternoon: left overs, water)

Nighttime:

The game was good until it wasn't. Javi played well, struck out and singled. They lost. The pathfinder decided to die on us, had to rush home and push it here. Showered and now watching TV 

(Nighttime: water, rice, cereal, ice cream)

Thunderbolts*

Morning:

Woke up and made the boys breakfast. Showered and got ready to o to church. We attended mass and the communion meeting after. 

(Morning: water, coffee, egg, bacon, cheese sandwich,  sausage)

Afternoon:

Hit up dollar tree and came home. Rested a bit and went to watch Thunderbolts* after I returned an itema at Khol's amd came home to start laundry. 

(Afternoon: water. Coke, popcorn)

Nighttime:

Played pickle with the boys, had dinner, showered and now watching TV until bed time.

(Nighttime: water. Beer. Sushi bake)

Game day

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Packed up the car and had Javi get ready for his game. Went over to the field and he went to warm up, I hung out a bit while they made the items for the pancake breakfast. Had breakfast and watched Javi's game. They lost, but Javi on again played a great game at catcher. His team let him down with not catching the ball on steal attempts. After the game we warmed up Gabe's team and got ready for the game.

(Morning: water. Coffee. Juice. Pancakes, eggs, sausage)

Afternoon:

Gabe's game was good, we won 12-0. Gabe ot hit by a pitch, singled and scored. He pitched 2 innings. After I got gas at Costco and came home to nap.

(Afternoon: water. Cheese its)

Nighttime:

We went to Pleasanton and got Abe some shoes amd pants for his communion outfit. Came home, cut my hair and shaved. Picked up dinner and showered. Ate and now watching TV until bed time.

(Nighttime: water. Beer. Rice. Chicken, meat. Salad)

Friday (5/2/2025

Morning:

Woke up and changed. Took the boys to school and came home to log in to work. Had a meeting and then had lunch.

(Morning: water. Coffee)

Afternoon:

Had lunch, picked up the boys. Finished work and took Javi to practice. 

(Afternoon: pupusas, chancho con yucca, orange soda  water)

Nighttime:

After work went to Manny'm and Vanessa's house to have smash burgers and drinks. Came home to shower and sleep.

(Nighttime:

Water, beer, hot dog, smash burgers, chips)

Money pit

Morning:

Wole up and changed. Made lunch for the boys. Gotnthem ready and took them to school. Came back home to log in to work. On a break we took the truck to get serviced. Came back, had a quick meeting and did some research. 

(Morning: water, coffee)

Afternoon:

Hit up Target,  picked up the truck, picked up the boys and had lunch. Got Gabriel readynfor practice and finished work.

(Afternoon: water. Coke, shrimp pasta Alfredo)

Nighttime 

Practice was good, came home and showered. Had some ice cream and now hanging out until bed time.

(Nighttime: ice cream, water)