Whatever!

This blog post may seem random, it may seem like I am just rambling and that my thoughts may or may not be fully formed but here goes anyway. A little bit of me uncut and raw with no edits...
Last week was not good, well, it started OK, but on Wednesday it went from OK to 'who made this sh*t sandwich? & why is it in my lunch box?" My car battery completely died on me, taking with it the alternator. I assume responsibility for this happening as the battery light did go on and I thought I would be able to make it to pay day to get a new one..WRONG! As luck would have it, the truck just stalled and I had to push it slightly up a hill to get it out of the way of traffic (I guess those weight lifting days at the gym are paying off!) I called AAA and waited. During this time I had already called my wife to come over to bring me my emergency credit card and of course Mother Nature decides to piss all over me in my moment of frustration and anger and hangs that cloud of rain over me and my car. When the AAA guy finishes and I pay him the fee, I start to drive to the garage where I will be potentially; excuse the term 'violated' with the cost of replacing the alternator. The folks at the garage were very nice, they even offered to give me a ride home. I politely declined and waited for my wife to pick up. Let me rewind for a second, all of this happened on the way to a workforce development forum that I was looking forward to attending, so I even missed out on that. So I get home and I am in no mood for anything. I wanted to curl up in a ball and hide in the closet so no one could see or talk to me. I get the phone call that they did need to replace the alternator and told me the cost. I did a little research on line and it seemed less then what other places would charge me so I went ahead and told them to repair the truck. I walked about a mile and a half to go get my car, every step a bit more disappointed in myself and the situation that I could have probably avoided. Now it turns out that my car battery gives out too much battery. So that was just Wednesday. At least I got some bit of good news last Friday. I can't really go into too much detail here but over the weekend I did and actually still feel some concern and fear over my back and left leg.
Last August as I was coming out of the shower I sprained a muscle in my lower back, at the time I did not know what I had did, I tried to stretch and lay down, but my foot began to go numb, I went to the emergency room and there was when my recovery of my first time throwing out my back began. I think it might have been two weeks ago during my first Yoga session that I attempted a pose and stained the muscle again, but recently I have been having pains again and a sharp pain going down to my lower left leg. It scares me because I do not want to be physically impaired in any way. That is why I started to go to the gym, to help me get into shape, lose some weight and relieve the pressure from my knees and back.
Did I mention it to anyone? I did and I tried, but there is only so much one can do for me. Some are supportive and tell me to be careful (which they know I will not actually do, since I am a bit hard headed) and some basically put me down and told me that I was complaining too much and that I was acting like..well this blog is too classy for those words. It's to a point where I don't want anyone to know anything. I would rather keep my mouth shut and try to deal with my pain alone, then sit there and have people talk about me. It's bad enough that I am scared that I may have a problem, comments really don't help. I do not want to turn to medication for this pain, because I do not believe it to be necessary.
Hopefully the ending of this week will be great! I am trying to take all of the negative energy that is put out there and spin it to be my positive energy for this Friday. May be then I can write a little more frequently, when I am sad I tend not to write too much because it reminds me of why I am feeling that way. So here is hoping to some great news! to more blogging, to more positivity!
There it is, I have not gone back to edit anything, I just wrote what was inside my head and heart. Next up for me today is...more gym time! Keep it classy!